The Hijab Obsession - Part I

I often will hear Muslim sisters (and brothers) say:

“I can’t stand to see sisters wearing niqab (the face veil.)”

“I can’t stand to see sisters wearing all black.”

And on the contrary, other sisters say…

“I can’t stand to see sisters wearing pants.”

“I can’t stand to see sisters wearing brightly colored clothes.”

Few Muslims would argue that the correct hijab for women is to cover everything except the face and hands, and not to wear anything that draws attention or flatters the figure. There might be some who will dispute this, but most Muslims and scholars subscribe to this understanding, even if they do not choose to adhere to it.

That being said, why is it that Muslim sisters are actually disgusted with one another and claim they can’t stand to see their fellow sisters dressed a certain way? We should be uplifting our sisters, instead of beating them down with our judgments and backbiting. Do you want to know what I can’t stand?

• I can’t stand to see sisters in cliques; whispering and giggling while making other sisters feel alone.

• I can’t stand to have a conversation about outer modesty, without considering also the inner modesty.

• I can’t stand to see the Muslim community divided over something as simple as dress code.

Some of you will read this and say, why is she saying these things, is she undermining the importance of hijab? Quite the opposite, my sisters and brothers. I am simply trying to promote empathy and humility. When we make judgments of each other, we are creating a divide, and that is the last thing the Muslims need to do when we are living in a society that dislikes all of us, no matter how we dress.

I am also encouraging sisters and brothers to use proper adab (manners) when it comes to correcting each other. We are supposed to pull the misguided person aside and teach them the correct way. But before that, you have to check your own intention (why are you really correcting them?) and also check your own correctness (different schools of thought believe in different things, so just stick to the Qur’an and Sunnah) and have proof of your correction. However, I find many times we can lead by example, correcting our own misguided ways before approaching anyone else. If you talk about your sister/brother to others or say sarcastic remarks, your sin is worse than theirs.

Here is some fruitful guidance from the Qur’an:

And when they hear AlLaghw (dirty, false, evil vain talk), they withdraw from it and say: “To us our deeds, and to you your deeds. Peace be to you. We seek not the ignorant.”

(Surah Al-Qasas: Verse 55)

There is much more I’d like to share on this topic, so please check back for part II and perhaps part III, God-willing. Any good you can extract from this article is from Allah, and any bad from me. I pray that my intentions are good and that Allah will guide us on the straight path. AMEEN

Moving Beyond the Hijab

Yes, I have decided to change the name of my blog from 'Digging for Knowledge' to 'Not Just Another Hijab Blog.' I have nothing against hijab/fashion blogs, in fact I follow a few myself. However, as a Muslimah, I find that the discussion amongst and about Muslimahs is much too often about hijab.

What is the correct hijab? To hijab or not to hijab? What colors are acceptable for women? How much of a woman has to be covered? What does hijab say about a Muslim woman's faith? What age to start our daughters wearing hijab? What are the latest hijab fashions?

All of these questions are quite valid, and a mountain of opinions are floating around the web on these topics. So, I just wanted to let everyone know that this is NOT just another hijab blog, because there are enough of those. My blog is to wander and explore a variety of topics; everything from faith to history to current events.

So, I thank all of you for being interested in reading a blog that is NOT centered around the way Muslim women dress :)

Judge Not!

Niqab: Oppression or Liberation?

Niqab: a face veil covering the lower part of the face (up to the eyes) worn by observant Muslim women

Oppression: the state of being kept down by unjust use of force or authority

Liberation: To set free, as from oppression, confinement, or foreign control

When I think of oppression, I think of slavery, prejudice, inequality, dictatorship, rape, abuse, lesser race, caste and class, the MAN, voting rights, civil rights, misogynist, and so on. So the question stands, can a niqab, a piece of cloth placed over the face, become a vehicle for oppression? Well, of course it can. Just like a miniskirt, or a haircut, or a room in a house.

Compairing the niqab to the miniskirt.

If a person of authority forces a woman to wear a mini-skirt every day, in order to make her feel used and worthless, the mini-skirt, a piece of fabric, then becomes a vehicle for oppression. It gets tricky when one tries to determine what actions fall under “force”. In America, we live in a society that is over sexualized. This is not an extreme statement; this is a common sense statement. Sex is everywhere: shows, movies, commercials, newsstands, street corners, schools, workplaces, and even places of worship. We live in an age where sex-scandals are top news-stories. These scandals have no limits- pastors and congressmen caught in homosexual acts, celebrities committing adultery with porn-stars and prostitutes, and let’s not forget about the molesting priests.

One would think a society with so much sexual deviance would try to counter this behavior with positive reinforcement. Perhaps a troubled society like this would encourage their young women and men to have decency and respect for their bodies. But this is just an ideology. The truth is that on the cover every popular teen magazine, you will find titles like, “Wanted List: Mod Mini-Skirts” (promoting the shortest skirts paired with platform stiletto heels) and “How to Make Out” (a complete detailed guide on tongue kissing).

Yet some women will argue that dressing sexy is a form of liberation. These women will say it is their right to bare their bodies and the female body is something that should be celebrated and not covered up. Buying into this concept might be easy if there were no such thing as “the glass ceiling”, sexual harassment, eating disorders, and the constant sexual objectification of teen girls and women on almost every media outlet.

The niqab is a relatively new concept in the west. Until recently, Americans would be most familiar with the face veiling from episodes of I Dream of Jeanni or from images of seductive and mysterious belly dancers from various films.

However, in these post 9/11 times, images of the niqab come to the west in forms of Afghan women covered in head-to-toe burqas in worn-torn Afghanitan. We read and watch news stories about women who are confined to their homes, not allowed to go to school or work. We read about young women falling victim to honor-killings and forced nuptials. Images of veiled women being beaten in the streets for having their ankles exposed immediately resurface when the American thinks about the niqab.

The trick question: What about American niqabbis? Not only immigrant women, but many American Muslim converts have adopted the niqab to demonstrate modesty and rebellion against a sexed-up culture. Some of these women even consider the niqab as a symbol of feminist liberation, taking back their rights over their bodies and the way society judges them. Some Western societies feel the niqab as being an threat, and have actually banned the garmet. This is one thing mini skirt wearers won’t have to worry about unless they visit Saudi-Arabia or another country where there are modesty laws in place for women.

“Their husbands force them to wear it”, “They are oppressing themselves”, “They have no identity.” Sure, these sentiments could be true of some women who don the niqab, just as the exact same sentiments could be true of a woman who sports a mini skirt. When it comes down to it, a piece of cloth cannot oppress a woman. A government, a society, an employer, husband, or father: they can oppress. They can misuse their authority to keep women down by denying them education and filling their minds with the words of men, instead of the words of God.

Society can oppress by portraying an unattainable image of what beauty should be and shove it down the throats of young impressionable girls and women everyday through every vessel. Oppressive husbands use insults and physical domination to hold down their women. A niqab, a miniskirt, an advertisement, a written or unwritten law, and sexist epithets are just a few examples of the devices for which oppressors can use to make women feel and exist as a lesser gender.

Do you get it? We are focusing on the wrong thing! Niqab? Mini-skirt? These things mean nothing. Educating minds and nurturing souls should be at the forefront of discussion. Let a woman have confidence. Let her believe in her God-given attributes. Let her build up her character and her faith and connection to God. By always focusing on what a woman is wearing or not wearing, we are encouraging the actions of the oppressors. We are tearing down the fragile state of the teenage girl, who is just beginning to figure out where her place is in the world. By empowering our women, we are empowering our societies. By oppressing our women, we are oppressing mankind.

The Prophet Muhammad said, may Allah's peace and blessings be upon him:
“Your Heaven lies under the feet of your mother.” (Ahmad, Nasai)

Judge Not!

Finding Peace through Faith, Family, and Creativity

Sometimes Life seems to be moving incredibly fast. It just seems like we are going through the motions without stopping to think or reflect. Sometimes life can seem to be hectic and overwhelming. At these times frustration can overshadow appreciation and patience. Negativity can outweigh positivity... but only if we let it.

What are the things that bring you peace? The things that bring you peace are the things that bring you joy when your situation appears to be grim. The things that bring you peace lift you up when your spirit is dragging on the ground. Your fire is lit; you are recharged; you are ready to pull yourself up by the bootstraps and face the world with a renewed optimism.

These are the things that bring me peace:

Wudu and Prayer: Wudu is the process Muslims preform of cleaning oneself before the prayer. This ablution purifies both the body and the spirit. Salat is the prayer preformed by Muslims five times a day (or at least we try!). For me the actual motions of standing and prostrating to my Lord while reciting the Arabic prayer brings a tranquility over my being.

My daughter I would be lying if I said my almost two-year-old was a constant source of tranquility! However, the undying love and appreciation she shows towards me is so terrific! And her smile and infectious laugh are instant mood lifters!

Writing: Everyone needs an outlet, and for me that is writing. Whether it be poetry, short stories, journal entries or blogs; writing has always been there for me- a constant companion through the good and the bad times.

Judge Not!

The Art of Arguing

True to the name of this blog, I am always digging for knowledge. After all, Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) commanded for us to "Seek knowledge from the cradle to the grave." However I have found that it is all to easy to slip into the mode of seeking conflict rather than truly seeking knowledge. Far too many times I will read an enlightening hadith or book written by a renowned scholar, then all of a sudden I think I am qualified enough to teach this precious new information to others. Then when someone disagrees with me, I feel the need to defend my point view to point where I find myself in a debate on a subject that I probably no very little about. Is it pride that drives me to the point of arguing with my fellow Muslims and beloved non-Muslim family and friends? Do I harvest an insatiable hunger to be right all the time? Surely I cannot be that egotistical? Well, I won't be that hard on myself, but I noticed that sometimes I can get so wrapped up in proving a point, that I myself is not willing to accept a different point of view. What happen to agreeing to disagree? I've discovered that when it comes to matters of religion, people are very sensitive because it is hard to admit that we have been serving our Lord incorrectly, whether through dress, prayer, or understanding our holy books. Ego also plays a part- a man doesn't want to be corrected by a woman, or an Arab by an Indonesian, or a parent by a child, or a teacher by a student, or an American convert by an Muslim-born immigrant . . . and the list goes on.

I think we can all learn to teach to and learn from each other with a greater sense of sensitivity and wisdom: maybe we are both right or perhaps we could both be wrong. Whatever the case, always seek refuge with Allah from the whisperings of the shatan before entering a discussion. Ask Allah to purify your intentions so that we are not just intentionally starting an argument for the sake of being right.

Judge Not!

JUDGE NOT!

My dear parents came to visit me from Philadelphia and of course I had to take them to see the sights and the lights of the Las Vegas strip. So I prepared myself for the too close for comfort crowds, the smoky casinos, and all the haram goings-on, but I did not prepare to JUDGE NOT. . . I was fine at first cruising from casino to casino pushing my baby stroller, wearing a colorful hijab and matching tunic. Then we landed at the Fashion Show mall food court. As my parents chowed down, my eye caught a glimpse of a scantily clad young woman laughing with her friends. All of a sudden I became fixated on this woman, clad in a purple spandex mini-dress, sparkly gold strappy platform heels, platinum gold long hair extensions, too-blue-to-be-true contact lenses, and enough make-up to paint the Sistine Chapel! My fixation quickly progressed to obsession as I thought: “Wow, she really thinks she’s cute. Ha!" “I mean she’s dressed like a two-dollar whore!” “No respectable man would be attracted to THAT!” Then I became all pious, thinking: “Poor thing, she needs Islam”. “She just doesn’t know any better. SHE IS LOST”.

Well, the truth is, I still have fleeting thoughts about that woman I saw in the food court over a month ago. I went home that night and pondered on why I had reacted in such a vehement fashion. My conclusion: She is me and I am her. I did to her what many people may be doing to me everyday. I judged her; and that was a dangerous thing. Once we start making assumptions about each other, we start to categorize them and usually we use this compartmentalizing to then elevate ourselves above our own downfalls and imperfections, i.e. “I am better because . . .” In my situation, who was more in the wrong; the woman in the tight dress or the woman in the hijab who judged and slandered the woman in the tight dress? As Muslims, we often recite Allah Knows Best, but do we really believe it and put it into practice?

Let’s not forget that all of us have a story and all of us have secrets that only a few people know, or maybe that only you and Allah know. As headlines in February wrote, “Muslim TV Mogul Muzzammil Hassan’s alleged beheading of wife, Asiya Hassan, may be honor killing”, I thought Oh God, Islam will surely be blamed for this one! Society has shown us many clear examples of how dangerous judging can be, yet we continue to cast fellow Muslims and fellow human beings into the hellfire. Allah is the only one with that authority because he is the only one who sees into the hearts of men.

We are far from perfect as individuals and we are far from perfect as Muslims. We can’t give dawah (inviting others to Islam) by pointing and whispering and we certainly can’t build our iman (faith) by shifting the blame. We all have skeletons in the closet, so when you see someone with their bones exposed, remember you are one soft layer away from being exposed yourself! These ayats have helped me think twice before I judge, and InshAllah (God willing) it will help you too. Read. Recite. Absorb.

Al Maida (5:48-50) Holy Qur’an

“To thee we sent the scripture in truth, confirming the scripture that came before it, and guarding it in safety: so judge between them what Allah hath revealed, and follow not their vain desires, diverging from the truth that hath come to thee. To each among you have we prescribed a law and an open way. If Allah had so willed, he would have made you a single people, but (His plan is) to test you in what He hath given you: so strive as in a race in all virtues. The goal of you all is with Allah; it is he that shows you the truth of the matters in which ye dispute;

And this (He commands): Judge thou between them by what Allah hath revealed, and follow not their vain desires, but beware of them lest they beguile thee from any of that (teaching) which Allah has sent down to thee. And if they turn away, be sure that for some of their crimes it is Allah's purpose to punish them. And truly most men are rebellious.

Do they then seek after a judgment of (The Days of) Ignorance? But who, for a people whose faith is assured, can give better judgment that Allah?”

That’s deep. Allah knows best.

A Family That Prays Together . . . Stays Together

This old Christian saying is all too applicable to the Muslim Ummah. After all, we are a family, and in a family there exists a variety of dynamic personalities. In America, Muslims are literally from opposite ends of the earth, sometimes making it awkward or even controversial to come together.

Ash hadu an la ilaha illalah wa ash hadu ana Muhammadur rasulullah.
There is no G_d but Allah, and Muhammad is the messenger of Allah.

This statement is our commonplace; it is our best trait; it is what we live by. We must ask Allah to strengthen and optimize our relationships with our Muslim brothers and sisters. I could say this a million times until I’m blue in the face, but it won’t help if I do not take the first step towards changing my ways. It is all too easy at times to choose one’s culture over one’s religion because a large part of who we are stems from our lineage and the environment in which we were raised. But when we are deep in our graves, we will not be asked from what country we hail, but we will be asked who is our G_d and what is our religion. Having pleasure in enjoying one’s culture and people is great and will probably make you a more confident individual. As Muslims we have to know the difference between being comfortable in our own skin and secluding ourselves to the point where we have become prejudice and close minded to other Muslims- our brothers and sisters.

Everyone knows the famous hadith, “Seek knowledge, even if you have to go to China.” Well, I’ve got great news: there is volumes of knowledge right beneath your noses: in the wisdom and good tidings of your fellow Muslims. It is amazing the knowledge we can absorb by listening to a sister that has traveled the world; or a brother who converted to Islam in prison and has a special love for the deen because it literally saved his life; or the Muslim that grew up being “culturally Muslim” overseas but didn’t really start practicing until arriving on American soil. We have so much to offer each other.

The first thing we can do is ask Allah to forgive us for our prejudices and our pride. The second thing we can do is step our game up a notch. By that I mean if you always make salat at the same masjid, go to jummah or a class at another masjid. If you always have the same people over for dinner and talk about the same things, have someone different over. If you feel as though you are not ready to dive in head first into the Muslim melting pot, read biographies/autobiographies about Muslims from different walks of life. I guarantee it will broaden your horizons! We may not agree on which moon sighting to follow to end our fast, or how covered is covered enough for Muslimahs, but we all agree on one thing: Ash hadu an la illaha illalah wa ash hadu anna Muhammadur rasulullah. So we need to remember everything else is water under the bridge. -

Allah knows best!

Judge Not!