LOVE: A four letter word

Okay, I just realized it is Valentine’s Day. I don’t celebrate it or acknowledge it as a holiday but one can’t help having love on the mind when it’s on every channel, even my rebellious LinkTV. There are cheesy red hearts and chocolate sales in every grocery store.

So this is NOT a Valentine’s Day bashing blog like you might expect from me.

This is a blog about love and how it can change your life. When we think of love we tend to think of romantic love, and then after that, love for our parents and children. But there is another love, a broader love that can shift the earth:

Love for humanity.

There is so much hate nowadays. It’s spouting from the mouths of politicians and warlords and terrorists. It’s emitting from the thoughts and actions of everyday citizens. We shouldn’t do good because we feel sorry for others: that is not only insulting, but it does not inspire growth. We shouldn’t do it out of sympathy or guilt. We should do good deeds out of LOVE. Love for humanity. Love for our Creator. Love for ourselves.

So whether you celebrate Valentine’s Day or not, there is one four letter word that should stay on your tongue and in your heart: LOVE

My Moral Mortality

Death. Dying. Dead. Fatality. Mortality. Grave. Mourning. Moving On.

Okay, I got if of my chest. Whew, That felt pretty good actually. This is a hard subject to talk about, whether it be in a blog, or with friends or even at a place of worship. We all know that death is the inevitable. As a Muslim I understand that "Every soul shall have the taste of death" Holy Quran 3:185. So I sit here in the middle of the night and I contemplate.

Initially, I think about the meaning of death; the moment of death. I ask myself, "How soon will I be forgotten on this Earth? A day? A month? A year? Twenty years? When will I become just a picture from another time buried in someones basement?" I know I am not supposed to be scared of death, but like many others, I struggle with that aspect. I'm just too darn inquisitive! I could keep myself up all night thinking about the Hows, Whys, Whens and Wheres. So instead I just decide to get it all out in these two paragraphs so I can move on to something much more tangible: LIFE.

I think this must be the key. For those of us who believe in an afterlife, we have to constantly consider what we are doing in this life that will affect our fate in the next. Will I be rewarded or punished? However, this is not our only driving force to do good by ourselves, our loved ones, and the society at large. Have you ever asked yourself why all the atheist of the world are not ruthless psycotic serial killers? Well fortunately for the human race, God has hard-wired us to want to do good(whether we accept his favor or not.) There will always be temptation to do bad, but for the overwhelming majority of the human race, WE WANT TO DO GOOD. Have you ever been in a situation when you know you can do something really wrong and get away with it, but you just don't do it? Or if you do act on your michieveous thoughts, you immediately feel a heavy weight of guilt? These are the attributes that makes us human: God's most complex creation.

Where am I going with this? LIVE YOUR LIFE THE BEST YOU CAN RIGHT NOW! Not a person on this earth knows the exact moment when they will breath their last breath, but we all know it's coming . . . sooner for some, later for the rest. We have no choice about of death, but we have the choice to do something good, bad or in between right now. Do something good for a complete sranger, or someone you love dearly. Don't get so overly consumed with the day to day struggles that you are not enjoying your life. Marrige, children, jobs, and worship can become so routine that we are not cherishing those special moments that make life so valuble. Many of life's seasons can be bittersweet: developing an aquired taste is the best advice I can give. Allah knows best!

-Judge Not!

I AM WOMAN

I like to call myself a realistic feminist. First I must give my definition of an unrealistic feminist: A woman who believes that women are equal to men in every way, shape and form and should be treated as such. After giving birth to my daughter, I am left without a doubt that woman and man are NOT created equal: there is no way my husband could have survived childbirth! I mean seriously, our bodies are just built for it- yes even the 1st so-called "pregnant man" (which obviously proves that a woman can call themselves a man, but God can reveal otherwise.)

I think the women's liberation movement was great because the truth is that we live in a misogynist society and sometimes drastic measures have to be taken to acquire civil rights. All I ask, is do not take away my God given right to be a wonderful, powerful, strong, unique WOMAN. It doesn't bother me that my husband has more upper body strength. As I watch the ways in which we interact with our daughter, they are not the same, and I am thankful for that. Women and men have unique qualities to bring to the table- in business, education, marriage, and child-rearing- one not more important than the other. Allah has created us in a dynamic fashion that we may never fully understand, but we can accept. The sooner one accepts and appreciates their attributes , the sooner one will be secure with the mind, body and soul God gave them. THANK GOD FOR WOMAN! . . . AND MAN!

-Judge Not!

JUDGE NOT!

My dear parents came to visit me from Philadelphia and of course I had to take them to see the sights and the lights of the Las Vegas strip. So I prepared myself for the too close for comfort crowds, the smoky casinos, and all the haram goings-on, but I did not prepare to JUDGE NOT. . . I was fine at first cruising from casino to casino pushing my baby stroller, wearing a colorful hijab and matching tunic. Then we landed at the Fashion Show mall food court. As my parents chowed down, my eye caught a glimpse of a scantily clad young woman laughing with her friends. All of a sudden I became fixated on this woman, clad in a purple spandex mini-dress, sparkly gold strappy platform heels, platinum gold long hair extensions, too-blue-to-be-true contact lenses, and enough make-up to paint the Sistine Chapel! My fixation quickly progressed to obsession as I thought: “Wow, she really thinks she’s cute. Ha!" “I mean she’s dressed like a two-dollar whore!” “No respectable man would be attracted to THAT!” Then I became all pious, thinking: “Poor thing, she needs Islam”. “She just doesn’t know any better. SHE IS LOST”.

Well, the truth is, I still have fleeting thoughts about that woman I saw in the food court over a month ago. I went home that night and pondered on why I had reacted in such a vehement fashion. My conclusion: She is me and I am her. I did to her what many people may be doing to me everyday. I judged her; and that was a dangerous thing. Once we start making assumptions about each other, we start to categorize them and usually we use this compartmentalizing to then elevate ourselves above our own downfalls and imperfections, i.e. “I am better because . . .” In my situation, who was more in the wrong; the woman in the tight dress or the woman in the hijab who judged and slandered the woman in the tight dress? As Muslims, we often recite Allah Knows Best, but do we really believe it and put it into practice?

Let’s not forget that all of us have a story and all of us have secrets that only a few people know, or maybe that only you and Allah know. As headlines in February wrote, “Muslim TV Mogul Muzzammil Hassan’s alleged beheading of wife, Asiya Hassan, may be honor killing”, I thought Oh God, Islam will surely be blamed for this one! Society has shown us many clear examples of how dangerous judging can be, yet we continue to cast fellow Muslims and fellow human beings into the hellfire. Allah is the only one with that authority because he is the only one who sees into the hearts of men.

We are far from perfect as individuals and we are far from perfect as Muslims. We can’t give dawah (inviting others to Islam) by pointing and whispering and we certainly can’t build our iman (faith) by shifting the blame. We all have skeletons in the closet, so when you see someone with their bones exposed, remember you are one soft layer away from being exposed yourself! These ayats have helped me think twice before I judge, and InshAllah (God willing) it will help you too. Read. Recite. Absorb.

Al Maida (5:48-50) Holy Qur’an

“To thee we sent the scripture in truth, confirming the scripture that came before it, and guarding it in safety: so judge between them what Allah hath revealed, and follow not their vain desires, diverging from the truth that hath come to thee. To each among you have we prescribed a law and an open way. If Allah had so willed, he would have made you a single people, but (His plan is) to test you in what He hath given you: so strive as in a race in all virtues. The goal of you all is with Allah; it is he that shows you the truth of the matters in which ye dispute;

And this (He commands): Judge thou between them by what Allah hath revealed, and follow not their vain desires, but beware of them lest they beguile thee from any of that (teaching) which Allah has sent down to thee. And if they turn away, be sure that for some of their crimes it is Allah's purpose to punish them. And truly most men are rebellious.

Do they then seek after a judgment of (The Days of) Ignorance? But who, for a people whose faith is assured, can give better judgment that Allah?”

That’s deep. Allah knows best.