The Hijab Obsession Part 2: Social Media- Pulling Us Together or Tearing Us Apart?

It’s been a while since Hijab Obsession Part 1, but what can I say? I only write when I am inspired. I AM SICK AND TIRED OF SISTERS TEARING EACH OTHER UP ON FACEBOOK. Ok? Got me? It’s sickening. I usually friend any sister who sends me a request. Since I never post anything super-personal, I don’t mind building up my sister-to-sister connection. However, I am now rethinking the whole social media thing.

I logged on last night to see what people were saying about the election, and of course a lot of the Muslims were arguing about whether or not to vote. I expected that. However, as I scrolled down I see a sister’s post, “I am sick of seeing these sisters walking around with their niqab flipped up!” Then the comments poured on about the sisters who “know they ain’t right” wearing turbans or colors or this or that or blah blah blah.

My first thought was, Uh… America just voted in a new President and this is the best you have to post? Then I really felt disgusted that these sisters took time out their day to bash other sisters for what they looked like on the OUTSIDE. And it made me think, dang, I give ALL Muslim sisters salaams, are they thinking these things when they see me on the street? Do they think that “I know I ain’t right?”

Ok, so every judgment should eventually bring on some self-assessment and reflection: Am I this judgmental? Yes, I love all my sisters and want the best for them, but there was that sister wearing a hijab with a lime green short set over the summer. And I sure did call up one of my sisters and have a good laugh. SHAKE MY HEAD! This is not appropriate behavior of a believing woman- period.

We are not supposed to backbite ANYONE. But when it comes to our sisters and brothers, we are actually supposed to look the other way and make an excuse for them. Yes, we are supposed to educate them, but not in a way to embarrass to make them feel lesser. And guess what, you may not be the one who is qualified to educate them. Ever think about that? Here’s some suggestions of what you could do next time you get your abayas in bunch and are about to call up every sister you know to blast a brother or sister who, “know they ain’t right.” That’s right put down your devices, and think before you post!

Example: You see a brother walk into a bar: Say to yourself, “I bet that brother is going in there looking for someone.” Then forget you ever saw him.

Example: You see a sister who wears niqab at the masjid in some hot pink tight booty shorts: “As Salaamu Alaikum Sister! How are you these days? Want to come to my house for some jasmine tea? We can read Qur’an or just talk.” And this is the hard part: don’t tell anyone, whether she accepts your invite or not!  Then pray for her and for yourself.

Example: Someone on facebook says something you really can’t stand, instead of getting in a heating argument you either: 1- hide/delete them or, 2- Say, “Alhamdulillah, Allah knows best my sister. I love you for the sake of Allah. Masjid ____ holds classes on this subject every Sunday after taleem. Salaam!”

We are all striving together! Don’t forget that. We must ask ourselves: What would the Sahaba do?

"He who relieves a hardship of this Dunya (this earthly life) or a believer, Allah will relieve a hardship of the Day of Resurrection for him; he who makes it easy for an indebted person, Allah will make it easy for him in the Dunya and the Hereafter; he who covers a Muslim (his mistakes and shortcomings), Allah will cover him in the Dunya and the Hereafter; Allah will be in the slave 's need, as long as the slave is in his (believing) brother's need…"

 [Saheeh Muslim]

And Allah SWT says:

And when they hear AlLaghw (dirty, false, evil vain talk), they withdraw from it and say: “To us our deeds, and to you your deeds. Peace be to you. We seek not the ignorant.”

(Surah Al-Qasas: Verse 55)

Islam: Where Would We Be Without It?

·      Question: Does The Koran* come off as tolerant of foreign peoples and religions Or do you detect seeds of intolerance within it? Obviously, various Islamic extremist groups have used the book to justify their repeated violence, from 1998 onwards.
* Koran is the spelling used in the textbook, The Norton Anthology of Western Literature. It should be noted the correct English transliteration accepted and used by English-speaking Muslims is Qur'an.

In an initial review of "The Koran," one might find it as sexist or intolerant of other religions. However, upon further research, it is clear that The Qur'an is a book that brought guidance and structure to many societies and people across the globe. If the book were intolerant or oppressive, Islam would not be the fastest growing religion in the world, practiced by over two billion Muslims worldwide.

The Koran came at a time in Arabian history where there were many idol worshipers. In Chapter 1, The Exordium, the scripture sets out the first and most important rule of Islam: There is no God, except for the One true God, proclaiming: “You alone we worship and You alone do we ask for help." A common misconception in Western society is that “Allah” is the “Muslim God” and Muhammad is the “Muslim Jesus.” But nothing could be farther from the truth. Allah is the same God of the Christians and the Jews, and Muhammad and Jesus are both considered prophets in Islam. If you ask a Muslim what religion the prophets Abraham or Moses or Noah were, they would say Muslim because a Muslim is a person who believes in the one true God, the God of All Mankind.

The next except from The Koran is Chapter 4: The Women. There are lots of rules and regulations laid out in this chapter. For instance, “Let not the rich guardian touch the property of his orphan ward; and let not him who is poor use more than a fair portion of it for its own advantage.” When Westerners talk about “Shari’a Law” the misconception is that it is some rule book the Muslims made up to oppress women and restrict society. Shari’a is no more than the rules and regulations that were laid out in the Qur’an to justly run society. This except is a perfect example of a small section of Shari’a law. This is a clear sign that the Koran is a protection for those who are oppressed and vulnerable.

Perhaps the most debated over ayat (verse) in the entire of The Koran is this one also from Chapter 4, The Women,

Men have the authority over women because God had made one superior to the other, and because they spend their wealth to maintain them. Good women are obedient. They guard their unseen parts because God has guarded them. As for those who fear their disobedience, admonish them and forsake them beds apart, and beat them. Then if they obey you, take no further action against them. Surely God is high, supreme.

At first read, this verse takes one aback. The words seem straight forward: Women are weaker than men, therefore they should be obedient, and if they disobey, punish them, even beat them if necessary! Whenever such strong statements are written, further research must be done. Upon researching many Islamic websites it is clear that Arabic is a very rich language and it is very hard to translate many words into other languages. “Beat” to English-speakers sounds very harsh, but just like the King James Version of the Bible, perhaps it should be considered that many things get lost in translation. This one small verse is used to label an entire population of Muslim men as misogynistic woman beaters, but sometimes one has to give leeway for misunderstandings.

The PBS documentary, Islam: an Empireof Faith: The Awakening and The Messenger were particularly eye-opening because they detailed the history and contribution the Islamic civilization made to the world:

“For the West, much of the history of Islam has been obscured behind a veil of fear and misunderstanding. Yet Islam’s history is deeply and surprisingly interwoven with Western civilization. It was Muslim scholars who reclaimed much of the ancient wisdom of the Greeks while much of Europe languished in the Dark Ages." (Empire of Faith)

Islamic scholars contributed math, science, and astrology to the world, when Europe was in their Dark Ages. Modern civilization owes much architecture, medicine, and literature to beginning in Islamic culture and society. Hospitals, the arches in churches, and mass recording of literature were all inventions of the Muslims around 1000 A.D. If this religion was full of terrorists, heretics, and fundamentalist, how could these advances been possible? It is obvious these people encompassed open minds and open hearts. After all, it was the Christian Crusaders sent by the Pope in Europe who acted as barbarians, burning towns to the ground, raping women and creating mayhem. And later, it was the fierce Mongols from Asia, who came to the East to conquer and destroy, but were overtaken by Islam and ended up spreading the religion to all of Asia. There is evidence of this today, being that there are more Muslims in Asia than any other continent in the world.

Islam is not a cult and it is not intolerant. Furthermore, anyone who might claim that it transformed into a violent religion as of latter times is misguided. The terrorists and fundamentalist make up a minute portion of the Muslims of the world. And even the misguided Muslims did not just become that way overnight: it could be argued that oppression and extreme poverty in the Middle East (and other countries around the world where there is drought and poverty like parts of Africa and Asia) became a breeding ground for anger and violence.

Whatever the reasons may be, it is important to clear up misconceptions so that Islamaphobia and hate towards Muslims does not continue to grow in the West. History can be used to teach the modern peoples about the contributions the Muslims made to the world and also to explain their rituals and beliefs, so that it is not considered to be strange or foreign. The Empire of Faith began its presentation with these words: “Islamic civilization has been one of humanities grandest achievements.” The people in the west need to know this and embrace it, so that further tensions can be quelled.

Keepin' My Game Tight: Part I, Faith

This slang phrase has long been popular amongst the gangsters and players. When one "keeps their game tight", they don't have any slip ups; every word and every move must be a calculated one, because any frivolous action or reaction made out of emotions could bring the roof tumbling down on their heads.

This anecdote can be applied to any area of life. This is how I have applied it in mine:

In Faith:

"Say, He is Allah the One; Allah, the Eternal, Absolute; He begetteth not, nor is He begotten; And there is none like unto Him."Surah Al-Iklas (The Purity of Faith), Holy Quran.

With this I remind myself that God is a merciful God, and can forgive just about anything with true repentance. Anything except associating partners with Him. This sin is a grave one and sometimes we commit it in stages. We get so wrapped up in our spouses, children, jobs, hobbies, mortgages, etc. that over time, we have eventually made these things our God. Allowing anyone or anything to completely occupy and determine your every thought and action is a form of worship.

If we define our existence by these things, what would happen to us should they no longer be present in our lives? Houses can be foreclosed, wealth can be lost, people will die. Shall we kill ourselves when these things happen? Shall we bury ourselves in grief layer upon layer until it is like you are dead? Certainly not.

Yes, I must keep my game tight. I mustn't get so wrapped up in my love for my family, that I rest my fate in their hands. I love them for the sake of Allah. If I live by this I can not be broken. I can not be deteriorated. My faith will be strong and unrelenting, God willing.

-Judge Not!

The Art of Arguing

True to the name of this blog, I am always digging for knowledge. After all, Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) commanded for us to "Seek knowledge from the cradle to the grave." However I have found that it is all to easy to slip into the mode of seeking conflict rather than truly seeking knowledge. Far too many times I will read an enlightening hadith or book written by a renowned scholar, then all of a sudden I think I am qualified enough to teach this precious new information to others. Then when someone disagrees with me, I feel the need to defend my point view to point where I find myself in a debate on a subject that I probably no very little about. Is it pride that drives me to the point of arguing with my fellow Muslims and beloved non-Muslim family and friends? Do I harvest an insatiable hunger to be right all the time? Surely I cannot be that egotistical? Well, I won't be that hard on myself, but I noticed that sometimes I can get so wrapped up in proving a point, that I myself is not willing to accept a different point of view. What happen to agreeing to disagree? I've discovered that when it comes to matters of religion, people are very sensitive because it is hard to admit that we have been serving our Lord incorrectly, whether through dress, prayer, or understanding our holy books. Ego also plays a part- a man doesn't want to be corrected by a woman, or an Arab by an Indonesian, or a parent by a child, or a teacher by a student, or an American convert by an Muslim-born immigrant . . . and the list goes on.

I think we can all learn to teach to and learn from each other with a greater sense of sensitivity and wisdom: maybe we are both right or perhaps we could both be wrong. Whatever the case, always seek refuge with Allah from the whisperings of the shatan before entering a discussion. Ask Allah to purify your intentions so that we are not just intentionally starting an argument for the sake of being right.

Judge Not!